Do It Yourself

Everybody reacts differently to loss.

For many, the emotional knot is too tight to deal with practical arrangements, and that is why a funeral director can be a blessing.

I suspect I’m one of those people who would want to undertake practical tasks myself – keeping my beloved dead close to me, where I can wash, dress, care for, be gentle with, and gradually say goodbye to their body. I wonder if undertaking these tasks is an important part of life and love and grief – whether many people might benefit from this way of expressing a last duty of care.

It would not have been so unusual a century ago, but it is now almost unheard of in western culture.

I currently have little practical experience of caring for the dead at home, but I am willing and eager to learn, to assist and support anyone who wishes to take this path.

I have researched some interesting and useful websites that might also be useful for you – particularly those below 

(do not let some of the complexities described put you off):

• https://www.goodfuneralguide.co.uk/looking-after-the-body-of-a-person-who-has-died/
  
• https://www.virtualhospice.ca
• https://www.simplicity.co.uk/advice/diy-funerals

Clearly, prior warning of a death of a loved one makes a Do It Yourself funeral much easier to prepare for. There are numerous practical items and considerations to take into account. For caring tasks such as washing and dressing, time is of the essence. 

Should the loss be sudden, unexpected or in hospital, there are still ways that you can ensure your loved one is returned to your care and tended in a way you would want. For example, talking to hospital staff about assisting with washing and dressing your loved one is an important immediate first step.

If this is something you would be interested in exploring, please do not hestitate to contact me. I will certainly try to assist in any way I can and might have some suggestions that could help. Don’t wait for a death, prepare now.

As with most of Just Wanted’s offers, with this option I ask you to pay whatever you feel you can / want to afterwards. I’m not solely in this for money – but for purpose and connection. It is my privilege to be involved. I would hope to cover any travel  / overnight stay costs as a minimum – it is possible there will be none. Alternatively I can offer a simple flat fee quotation based upon our agreed time requirements, if you prefer.